Public speaking is hard. You stand up in front of a room full of people, some of whom you know quite well, while others are complete strangers. Hopefully, you are prepared well and know what you want to say. Sometimes, however, things don’t go quite as planned. You start second-guessing yourself and asking, “Did I say this already or was that during the 9?” Or you start editing your message on-the-fly. Or there are metaphors competing in your head–which one wins? Sometimes both. Or we discover we have no internal monologue.
I’ve not done a ton of public speaking, but I’ve done some. And I think I’ve had all of those things happen to me. So it’s with great humility that I start collecting the funny stuff that is said when we stand in front of others to communicate. Because seriously, we can’t take ourselves to seriously. (“Wait, did I just say ‘seriously’ twice? Dangit!”)
- “Often, God always has a plan for the things He is doing in our lives.”
- “The $10 ticket covers the free appetizers.”
- “And in so doing, it’s a great way to hang some flesh on these concepts.”
- “I really missed you all last week, like really bad, like in the psyco ex-girlfriend kinda way.”
- “I know some of you think that 4 months is a long time to search for a new worship director, but remember it took over a year to find someone as well qualified as me.”
This is (hopefully) the beginning of a great collection of funny things uttered from stage. To protect the guilty, we’ll omit names (I did actually utter one of those, you can try to guess which one…and Jason Cole supplied one of them–thanks man!) I think it would be great fun if you would send me your favorite “Said On Stage” quotes and we’ll start compiling them. Colin’s offered to put up a list over at FaithTools and I may well mirror that on my site as well (you can’t have too many backups of priceless material like this!).
So when you hear something funny, odd, or just a really creative use of the language, post it in the comments and we’ll start adding it to the list. We all work really hard, so share the joy!